There is a feeling that you get when there is true happiness going through you, it's like the feeling you get when you're scratching somewhere that itches, but it's inside you. Weird description but that's what it feels like to me. What if I told you that you have the power to feel like this anytime you want to? Well guess what homie, you can by loving yourself. No i'm not talking about masturbating, I mean value your feelings, your thoughts, the way you look, your actions, your dreams, everything about yourself. I see so many people who don't value themselves nearly as much as they should and as a result they accept other people treating them how they see themselves, which is not nearly as good as they should be treated. I see so many people who have low self esteem because they don't look like the image society paints as "beautiful". I'm not going to lie, there are days when I think I look ugly as fuck and I pick at everything that's wrong with me, honestly we all have those days because no one is perfect. What makes you beautiful is the way you carry yourself. You might not be tiny with a fat ass, pretty eyes and long hair, but carry yourself like a queen and people will notice. You can't be confident in the way you look if you don't accept your flaws and work with them. If you're a big girl, carry that shit like a queen, if you're purple, wear that shit like you know you're beautiful. Confidence and charisma triggers a reaction in people that just being beautiful can't.
Loving yourself and having a positive mind is so important, especially with all the bullshit we live in. Do you know how many people on this earth would love to see another human being fail for no reason other than for the sheer entertainment of watching them fail? That shit makes me sick to my stomach. When you truly love yourself, none of the bullshit can touch you. I'm so serious, the way i'm feeling right now, mothafukin Oprah could call me a negative, conceited bitch to the world and I wouldn't give a flying fuck. Know why? I value myself and know myself enough to know that that's not true. A lot of people take being focused on yourself as being selfish and conceited but those are people who don't know how to open their minds and look deeper to the root of someone's attitude to see why they carry themselves that way. Selfish is a trait that I personally hate in people so I try my best to avoid it. Somebody telling me that i'm being selfish when i'm focusing on myself makes no sense to me. See, they're so one track minded that they don't stop to think that maybe i'm getting myself right so that I can be a good person to others. Being selfish means that you don't give a fuck about anybody else but yourself and your well being, both mentally and physically , loving and taking care of yourself is totally different because you don't give up caring for others to look after yourself. You don't say fuck everybody else's needs and wants and i'm just gonna do what is great for me and me only and basically shit on everyone else who's trying to do the same, that's selfish and fucked up, a person with a positive mind uplifts other people while uplifting themselves. Conceit is when you love yourself to the point that you put yourself higher than everyone else and treat them as such, no bueno boo. A big part of being positive is never putting anyone down in order to do it. Know those people who are like "oh I'm having such positive thoughts and Sally's just a bitter bitch because she doesn't have the same thoughts as me". I have news for you sweetheart, your hustle is backwards and your fraudulent ways are transparent. People like that try so hard to exude positivity but don't know what the fuck it is, so they tell everybody how positive their thoughts are when they're really miserable and overcompensating. They don't know what it is to feel comfortable enough with themselves to be honest with themselves. They don't know how to not give a fuck about the things others say about them, they don't know what it is to live their lives for themselves. A HUGE part of loving yourself is being honest enough with yourself to admit your faults and fix them, not because anyone else told you it's a problem, but because you think they're a problem. I know people who have their head stuck so far up their asses that they can't even see themselves, and you know what, it's none of my business because in time they'll learn. A wise woman once said, "When you ain't shit, something will always happen to you to remind you that you ain't shit," and honestly, that was some of the realest shit I've ever heard. The only person's opinion that you should really give a fuck about is yours, but if there is something really wrong with you, if the same shit keeps happening over and over again with you and different people and it keeps hurting the people around you, pull your head out of your ass and fix it.
Not giving a fuck is not for people who are blind to their fucked up ways. You know, deep down you know when you fuck up because you feel that twinge every time you look at or even think about the person you hurt. Apologizing is not suicide and I will never understand why people act like it is. Have the courage to admit that you're wrong and apologize if you hurt someone, it's not going to kill you, in fact it will make you stronger. Even if someone hurts you, forgive them because when you don't, you're only hurting yourself. Yes, I know some people are fucked up and they did fucked up things to you, but every time you think of what that person did and it makes you angry, that person is controlling you. The way you feel is the way you will react to certain situations and if your actions are a result of what that person did to you, then that person is your puppeteer. Think about it, what they did controls how you act and think. You have to learn to let shit go, meditate, pray, get counseled, do whatever it takes but you have to let that negativity go because that shit is poison. You wouldn't poison the one you loved so why would you do that to yourself? '
What about the ones who mistake honesty for negativity? Truth is, honesty can sometimes come off as negativity because the truth isn't always pretty. Someone told me that i'm such a negative person because I told them the truth about a situation that they were going through, i'm talking bout this girl got so upset and dropped me as a friend, took a molehill and turned it into a mountain and I honestly didn't even argue back with her, my response to the text was "ok" because honestly, I didn't give a fuck. I didn't give a fuck for the simple fact that I know that i'm not a negative person, you don't know me nearly as much as I know myself because I love myself and I took the time to figure myself out, so why would I listen to you?................don't worry, i'll wait. If you ask me for my opinion, that is what you're going to get because I try to be a honest person and if i'm honest with you and you don't like it, love yourself enough to either know that i'm wrong, which I could be, or take a look at yourself and admit that I am right and fix that shit, not because I say so, but because you're honest enough with yourself to know that you need to fix it.
All i'm saying is just please value yourself enough to not let other people's words affect you in a negative way. Words don't hurt you, it's your interpretation of those words that hurts you. Don't sell yourself short in this life and don't let anyone treat you any less than what you know you deserve. Don't settle for shit and don't let anyone else control your thoughts. Your thoughts are powerful, the most powerful things you have and if you let other people control them then you're in more trouble than I can tell you. If you're a good person and you know you're a good person, take that attitude with you wherever you go and apply it to everything you do because no one can make you feel anything without your permission.

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